I'm Just An Ordinary Man (Voice) - Rex Harrison
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[00:00.72]P: Higgins, forgive the bluntness, but if I'm to be in this business,
[00:04.40]I shall feel responsible for the girl.
[00:06.21]Are you a man of good character where women are concerned?
[00:10.56]H:Have you ever met a man of good character where women are concerned?
[00:14.00]Well, I haven't.
[00:14.86]I find that the moment I let any woman make friends with me,
[00:17.54]She becomes jealous, exacting, suspicious, and a damned nuisance.
[00:22.44]And I find that the moment that I make friends with a woman,
[00:24.76]I become selfish and tyrannical.
[00:26.43]So here I am, a confirmed old bachelor, and likely to remain so.
[00:30.28]Well after all, Pickering,
[00:32.85]I'm an ordinary man,
[00:34.88]Who desires nothing more than just an ordinary chance,
[00:39.38]To live exactly as he likes and do precisely what he wants.
[00:44.08]An average man am I of no eccentric whim,
[00:48.67]Who likes to live his life, free of strife, doing whatever he thinks is best for him,
[00:57.18]Well, just an ordinary man.
[01:02.08]But, let a woman in your life,
[01:05.18]And your serenity is through,
[01:08.01]She'll redecorate your home from the cellar to the dome,
[01:10.94]And then go to the enthralling fun of overhauling you.
[01:15.19]Let a woman in your life,
[01:17.81]And you're up against a wall,
[01:20.60]Make a plan and you will find she has something else in mind,
[01:23.53]And so rather than do either you do something else that neither likes at all.
[01:29.00]You want to talk of Keats or Milton,
[01:32.08]She only wants to talk of love,
[01:34.56]You go to see a play or ballet,
[01:37.24]And spend it searching for her glove,
[01:40.07]Let a woman in your life,
[01:42.55]And you invite eternal strife,
[01:45.99]Let them buy their wedding bands
[01:48.86]For those anxious little hands.
[01:52.06]I'd be equally as willing for a dentist to be drilling than to ever let a woman in my life.
[02:01.06]I'm a very gentle man,
[02:03.69]Even-tempered and good-natured whom you never hear complain,
[02:07.89]Who has the milk of human kindness by the quart in every vein,
[02:12.44]A patient man am I down to my fingertips,
[02:16.93]The sort who never could, ever would,
[02:20.07]Let an insulting remark escape his lips.
[02:26.29]A very gentle man.
[02:30.39]But, let a woman in your life,
[02:32.08]And patience hasn't got a chance.
[02:34.49]She will beg you for advice, your reply will be concise,
[02:37.43]And she'll listen very nicely,
[02:38.74]And go out and do precisely what she wants!
[02:42.94]You were a man of grace and polish
[02:45.83]Who never spoke above a hush,
[02:48.46]Now all at once you're using language
[02:51.29]That would make a sailor blush,
[02:54.17]Let a woman in your life,
[02:56.64]And you're plunging in a knife,
[03:00.08]Let the others of my ***,
[03:02.81]Tie the knot around their necks,
[03:05.79]I'd prefer a new edition of the Spanish Inquisition than to ever let a woman in my life.
[03:15.61]I'm a quiet-living man,
[03:17.93]Who prefers to spend the evenings in the silence of his room,
[03:22.38]Who likes an atmosphere as restful as an undiscovered tomb,
[03:26.84]A pensive man am I of philosophic joys,
[03:31.29]Who likes to meditate, comtemplate,
[03:34.32]Free from humanity's mad inhuman noise.
[03:41.21]A quiet-living man.
[03:44.65]But, let a woman in your life,
[03:48.59]And your sabbatical is through,
[03:51.42]In a line that never ends come an army of her friends,
[03:54.20]Come to jabber, and to chatter and to tell her what the matter is with you!
[03:59.52]She'll have a booming boisterous family,
[04:01.44]Who will descend on you en mass,
[04:05.02]She'll have a large wagnerian mother,
[04:07.71]With a voice that shatters glass.
[04:10.34]Let a woman in your life,
[04:12.96]Let a woman in your life,
[04:29.95]I shall never let a woman in my life.
[00:04.40]I shall feel responsible for the girl.
[00:06.21]Are you a man of good character where women are concerned?
[00:10.56]H:Have you ever met a man of good character where women are concerned?
[00:14.00]Well, I haven't.
[00:14.86]I find that the moment I let any woman make friends with me,
[00:17.54]She becomes jealous, exacting, suspicious, and a damned nuisance.
[00:22.44]And I find that the moment that I make friends with a woman,
[00:24.76]I become selfish and tyrannical.
[00:26.43]So here I am, a confirmed old bachelor, and likely to remain so.
[00:30.28]Well after all, Pickering,
[00:32.85]I'm an ordinary man,
[00:34.88]Who desires nothing more than just an ordinary chance,
[00:39.38]To live exactly as he likes and do precisely what he wants.
[00:44.08]An average man am I of no eccentric whim,
[00:48.67]Who likes to live his life, free of strife, doing whatever he thinks is best for him,
[00:57.18]Well, just an ordinary man.
[01:02.08]But, let a woman in your life,
[01:05.18]And your serenity is through,
[01:08.01]She'll redecorate your home from the cellar to the dome,
[01:10.94]And then go to the enthralling fun of overhauling you.
[01:15.19]Let a woman in your life,
[01:17.81]And you're up against a wall,
[01:20.60]Make a plan and you will find she has something else in mind,
[01:23.53]And so rather than do either you do something else that neither likes at all.
[01:29.00]You want to talk of Keats or Milton,
[01:32.08]She only wants to talk of love,
[01:34.56]You go to see a play or ballet,
[01:37.24]And spend it searching for her glove,
[01:40.07]Let a woman in your life,
[01:42.55]And you invite eternal strife,
[01:45.99]Let them buy their wedding bands
[01:48.86]For those anxious little hands.
[01:52.06]I'd be equally as willing for a dentist to be drilling than to ever let a woman in my life.
[02:01.06]I'm a very gentle man,
[02:03.69]Even-tempered and good-natured whom you never hear complain,
[02:07.89]Who has the milk of human kindness by the quart in every vein,
[02:12.44]A patient man am I down to my fingertips,
[02:16.93]The sort who never could, ever would,
[02:20.07]Let an insulting remark escape his lips.
[02:26.29]A very gentle man.
[02:30.39]But, let a woman in your life,
[02:32.08]And patience hasn't got a chance.
[02:34.49]She will beg you for advice, your reply will be concise,
[02:37.43]And she'll listen very nicely,
[02:38.74]And go out and do precisely what she wants!
[02:42.94]You were a man of grace and polish
[02:45.83]Who never spoke above a hush,
[02:48.46]Now all at once you're using language
[02:51.29]That would make a sailor blush,
[02:54.17]Let a woman in your life,
[02:56.64]And you're plunging in a knife,
[03:00.08]Let the others of my ***,
[03:02.81]Tie the knot around their necks,
[03:05.79]I'd prefer a new edition of the Spanish Inquisition than to ever let a woman in my life.
[03:15.61]I'm a quiet-living man,
[03:17.93]Who prefers to spend the evenings in the silence of his room,
[03:22.38]Who likes an atmosphere as restful as an undiscovered tomb,
[03:26.84]A pensive man am I of philosophic joys,
[03:31.29]Who likes to meditate, comtemplate,
[03:34.32]Free from humanity's mad inhuman noise.
[03:41.21]A quiet-living man.
[03:44.65]But, let a woman in your life,
[03:48.59]And your sabbatical is through,
[03:51.42]In a line that never ends come an army of her friends,
[03:54.20]Come to jabber, and to chatter and to tell her what the matter is with you!
[03:59.52]She'll have a booming boisterous family,
[04:01.44]Who will descend on you en mass,
[04:05.02]She'll have a large wagnerian mother,
[04:07.71]With a voice that shatters glass.
[04:10.34]Let a woman in your life,
[04:12.96]Let a woman in your life,
[04:29.95]I shall never let a woman in my life.
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